circa 1985...

Last week my friend Sandy posted this photo on facebook! Sandy and her husband were one of our first "couple" friends after we got married. The photo was taken at their apartment and I know it's Christmas because I'm wearing red and there is a package on the sofa! Rick pretty much looks the same other than less hair and more gray and that moustache is history now a goatee and I like it better. When he is clean shaven I don't really recognize him. That was 25 years ago and 50 lbs ago.  I have been on Weight Watchers since Sunday and when I want to eat something bad for me, I look at this photo and others around here and remind myself that I used to be a size 2 and am now a size 16.  There I said it...it really hurts to think I have done this to myself. I found out when one of our daughters was a teen that I am an emotional eater...in a really big way!

My biggest fear now is that when I do lose the weight...and I will, that I will be super wrinkled and Rick will start calling me Baggy...he called me Tubby for my entire pregnancy but it did stop the day Sydney was born. He does this and there is no stopping him. As soon as he found out that nobody was allowed to call me Suzy, that was my name for a long time. My mom never allowed me to be called Suzy. She gave me my name and she really liked it. I understand that because I'm not crazy about Sydney being called Syd.  I don't hate it but I'm just not crazy about it.

By the way,  I really don't have any desire to be a size 2 again...that's just crazy. but I do want to look and feel healthy again and would love to avoid more surgery.  I have it in my mind that my weight was a contributing factor in my health woes. My next goal is to get moving again. I'm sure I will be posting again with my progress.  Since I am not going to WW meetings I thought I needed some accountability.

I was considereing another diet but at this time I will stick with this one...for now anyway until I get things under control. Also the other "diet" is heavy on nuts and seeds which I love but not so good for my diverticulitis...I will probably change to that diet once I figure out how to work out those details!  I would prefer to keep the rest of my colon thank you very much!